Let’s talk about August birthdays

AUGUST is upon us, and with it a whole host of birthdays. Yes: this is actually the most popular month to be born in the US, and one of the most popular in the UK as well. The dead of winter’s just nine months prior to August, so I’ll let you draw your own conclusions as to why that might be the case (bow-chicka-bow-wow).

What does it mean to be born in August? Are Augustine babies especially hot and sticky? Do they have a particular proclivity for popsicles?

After waxing poetic on what makes June and July babies special, I feel absolutely prepared as an authoritative source on August birthdays. Bring your swimming trunks.

What kind of people are born in August?

If you’re into knowing that being born in August makes you a roaring Leo or a sweet Virgo, then you certainly don’t need me to tell you all about how the stars determine your fate. Enjoy.

August was so named after Augustus Caesar, the heir to the slightly-better-known Julius. August babies are much the same in character: definitely regal, but not spotlight hogs.

The flower of this month is the gladiolus, which represents integrity. Such are the Augustians, never seeking fame for fame’s sake. They are true to the core.

Due to being born into a world of soaring temperatures and sweaty armpits, August babies are remarkably cool-headed to compensate. They may safely be relied upon to keep their head on straight, even under great duress. That said, it can be near-impossible for them to fake excitement, even when socially convenient (“Marie from the office is pregnant, again? With quadruplets, you say? Ah. Well, wow. Yes. Isn’t that… nice?”).

Many people with August have a secret dirty fingernail fixation. They also enjoy a good chocolate bar far more than average, perhaps because it’s so difficult to keep from melting during their birth month.

What famous people were born in August?

August is replete with beloved famous folks. Mick Jagger, for one. Who doesn’t love Mick Jagger? As long as you’re not singing that awful song about having moves like him, anyway.

Madonna is an August baby too, as are Jennifer Lawrence, Andy Warhol, Usain Bolt, and Robert De Niro.

Looking back a little further – back to 1819, to be precise, Herman Melville was born on August 1st. Almost a century later, Louis Armstrong came blasting into the world in New Orleans. August gave us Alexander Fleming, who gave us penicillin, so cheers to that.

What it’s like to celebrate your birthday in August

Being born in August means that you’re either the oldest or the youngest in your class. Either way is great – you’re either taller than everyone else (score) or will probably outlive everyone else (double score).

It also means that your birthday comes when everyone is on vacation, which can be awesome or awful depending on your perspective. Sure, plenty of people are away on holiday, but the ones who are around are statistically five times as likely to be in Party Mode. Water balloon fight, anyone?

There are also sales in the stores in August, which means you get all of last season’s crap as presents. That might be why August babies aren’t particularly cutting-edge.

Who do you know with an August birthday?

It’s finally August, so it’s high time we celebrated those born this month. There’s no better time of the year to do it.

August birthdays are, on the whole, pretty great. Were you born in August? Do you know anyone who was? Does all this description match their personality to a T, or are they just not that into chocolate? Let me know in the comments below.

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